Snake bites, Tortoises and Lizzies 11 June 2020

Once again peeps in Blogland, we is Samson an Delilah puppies wot wos born an bred on a fabulous island called Corfu. We is fascinated by all the weird fings that live outside in the garden. There is ants wot make dual carriageways and go back an forth to get stuff for their nests. There are tortoises wot are weird. They have floppy bodies that live inside a shell. They walk around as if they own the place crashing through the undergrowth but when we go up to say hello, they disappear inside their shell. Wot is that about? Their head, legs and tail just vanish and no matter how much we bark at them they won’t come out. Luna wos very brave and picked one up in her mouf the uvva day and it pee’d on her. Yurrrghhh!! The Missus took it from her and put it outside under a plant so it could get over the terrible shock of being in Luna’s mouf. Its shell had a few nibbles off it but it walked off very quickly to get away as soon as possible.

Then there is the lizzies wot Algy and Bertie catch ‘an bring in the house. The uvva day The Boss wiv the furry face sed wot is that thing wiggling on the sofa. The Missus looked and found it was the tail of a lizzie wot she picked up still wiggling and frew it outside. Later the lizzie crept out from where it wos hiding an’ the missus picked it up and took it outside where it could grow it’s tail back again. Weird isn’t it? We finks we must be able to grow our tails back agen, but it would hurt a lot for them to come off in the first place so we’re not keen on that idea.

There is also snakes, an Algy caught one the uvva day. Last year wen the Missus and The Boss had anuvva lot of puppies, they woz playin’ outside in the evening, and The Missus wos ‘puterising when Algy warned all the puppies off. The Missus didn’t know wot he was doing so came outside to wotch him, as she fort he wos wanting to play with his favourite bone, but he wosn’t. He had wot she fort was a small stick that wos bent in the middle. All the puppies were wotchin’ from behind Algy but he was making sure they din’t get near his stick. Suddenly Algy picked up the stick an threw it in the air and caught it. Then the Missus saw it wos a snake as it wiggled. She called to Algy to leave, and just at that moment The Boss with the furry face came into the garden, grabbed a rake picked up the snake wiv it and threw it over the fence. The Boss then started up the BBQ getting it ready for dinner. The Missus went back to her ‘puter and stroking the bald mouse wot we is jealous of as it gets more ‘tention than we do. Suddenly The Boss shouted out to The Missus “there’s somefink rong with Algy”. Algy wos frothing at the mouth and his face wos all swollen. The Missus phoned the Vet an’ he said come straight away. As they left our little house on the hill the sky was getting dark and suddenly Zeus started throwing huge lightning bolts across the sky and it got very dark and the rain came down and down and down so hard they couldn’t see to drive. The Vet gave Algy’ jections and some drugs, an’ phoned every day to see if Algy wos OK. For once Algy wos ‘llowed to be in the hooman’s bedroom as he wos too ill to be with the uvva dogs. He had to eat special food as the snake had bitted him in the mouf an he couldn’t eat propa food. Each day his face and chest got more an more swollen and no one fort he would live. But Algy did get better in the end, because he’s a tough Corfiot mutt, and nuffink bovvers him.

As for the Boss an’ Missus they had to eat cold soggy burgers wen they got back from the Vet.

One question. Wot happened to the uvva puppies wot they had? Did they eat them? OOO we hope not.

P.S. The Missus sez that Wally, Poppy, Belle, Callie, and Murphy the puppies from last year all have gone to their forever homes, one in Corfu the others in UK, and she sez she and the Boss with the furry face don’t eat doggies. Phew that’s a relief.